CHAPTER LXV

THE CAPTAIN’S WINDFALL

The verdict sank deep into the heart of Captain Doleful.

He returned to Handley Cross long before people were stirring; but Miss Jelly’s watchful eye “traced the day’s disaster in his morning face.” Taking to his bed, the captain obstinately remained there for two whole days, impervious to the call of friends and foes. The verdict was one of the severest blows that had befallen him in a somewhat eventful life. The price of the horse was nothing compared to the long lawyer’s bills that were sure to follow,—a hundred and fifty pounds, perhaps. Dreadful! But for the pleasure of trouncing Jorrocks, he could have had the thing tried quite as well in the county court for five pounds.

Consolation, however, came on the third day, and an important change commenced in the fortunes of our captain. Sitting in moody stupor, with a last week’s “Paul Pry” in his hands, Miss Jelly’s little girl presented herself before him with a deep black-edged letter, bearing the Clifton post-mark. The captain started at the sight, for though almost alone in the world, the sign of mourning shook his shattered nerves.

He broke the seal with nervous hand, and read as follows:—

“Sir,—We have the honour to acquaint you that your good friend and our excellent client, Miss Louisa Crabstick, is no more;—she expired this morning at half-past six, without pain or struggle. As her confidential advisers, we are in a situation to acquaint you, that a few days since she executed a will in your favour, and it is highly important that you should forthwith repair to the spot, and take upon yourself the direction of affairs. Her property is considerable, and we believe there is a large sum of money and valuables in the house, all of which should be looked to without delay. In making this melancholy announcement, we beg to offer our congratulations on your justly merited good fortune, and to add that any instructions you may honour us with will be carefully attended to. We have the honour to subscribe ourselves, dear sir, your most obedient and very humble servants,

What a state of excitement Captain Doleful was thrown into on reading this! A new world seemed opening before him, and he felt himself hurrying away from the cares, the contentions, and the disappointments of the old one. For once a lawyer’s letter conveyed a charm. For some moments he was perfectly childish. He looked at the letter, then he looked at himself; then came the recollection of former days, with a slight twinge of regret that one, to whom he had poured forth his whole soul in mercenary adoration, should now be no more. That was quickly followed by wonderment at getting the money, and a hasty speculation as to the amount. His head was in a complete whirl, and he ordered and ate half-a-dozen calves’-foot jellies with apparent unconsciousness.

That evening saw him off to Clifton, and surprise at the unexampled extravagance of his conduct having tempted Miss Jelly to cast a hasty glance at the letter as it lay on the table during the captain’s absence, sorting his clothes, the confectioner’s shop spread the news like wildfire, and half-a-dozen candidates for the office of M.C. sprung up before the captain was well out of the town.

Captain Doleful’s acquaintance with Miss Crabstick was one of those intimacies that frequently arise where people are thrown together in watering-place idleness, and though considerably older than himself, he had no hesitation in making the excess of money balance the excess of years. Miss Crabstick, however, conscious of her wealth, and not despairing of her charms, determined upon trying another season or two elsewhere, before yielding to the captain’s solicitations. That season or two had been protracted into eight or ten, and the captain had almost ceased to think of her. Brighton, Cheltenham, Hastings, and Clifton had all been tried since first they met at Willoughby Baths, and still Miss Crabstick thought a season at the German Spas would supply the quid pro quo, or “equivalent,” that she deemed essential to connubial happiness. She died.— Her wealth was great,—more than people imagined, and the captain, with the assistance of Pike, Lamb, and Lambro, soon discovered he might swear the property under twelve thousand pounds, without defrauding himself.

He was now a great man. The M.C. card-plate was thrown aside, and a flourishing new one struck, on which Captain Doleful alone appeared, in the midst of a broad melancholy-looking black border. The captain was well up in the world. His own wealth, added to Miss Crabstick’s, made a man of him.

Poor Miss Jelly’s lodgings were deserted, and he returned to Handley Cross to occupy the best apartments at the Dragon Hotel. He brought with him the dear deceased’s baboon, three Angola cats, a paroquet, and a silver squirrel, all especially provided for by will, and charged with his attention, on forfeiture of a certain sum.

Great was the change in the manner of the people. Instead of the captain running about the town leaving cards on new-comers, and refreshing the minds of the old ones with his name, notes, cards, and invitations poured in apace, and he sat in his rooms considering who he should honour, and who not. His wealth was magnified into treble and quadruple its amount, and the old ladies were astonished that so attractive a young man should so long have remained single.—Not that they wished for anything of the sort now,” looking at their daughters, “but before he got all the money, they would have liked it well enough;” just as disinterested old ladies will talk, though they know nobody believes them.

So Doleful set up to be cock of the walk, and longed for old Jorrocks back, that he might snub him.